8.10.2003

 

My stalker said I was being "unkind" to him; I assume that means cuz I haven't agreed to go out with him. At any rate, he says this right after he greeted me in the "kindest" way possible: "HEY YOU! COME HERE!" Nice. So I told him off. I'm sure everything I said bounced right off of him (as is the trend), but...I felt empowered for the moment.

Another great Wal-Mart caveat: What's the best way to get a DWI? Well, begin with drunken driving, situate yourself directly behind a slow-moving vehicle that's exhibiting erratic braking patterns. Next, use your truck to give the turtle a little "love-tap" to get him/her going a little. Finally, realize that the car you've just bumped is actually an unmarked police car. The rest will work itself out naturally. That's a true story people, straight from the upstanding folks that work overnights at the Wal. They never cease to amaze me.

10:43 AM

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